Whilst I am under no disillusion that my images may evoke all kinds of sexual attention and feelings, it never ceases to amaze me how random strange people will start following my account(s) on social media and feel it is okay to tell me all kinds of things that I am pretty sure they’d never say to me in person. Or to anyone for that matter.
Over the past two days, Facebook decided to mix up the algorithm, and suddenly one received a million new follow requests. With that, I know comes a whole bunch of thirsty individuals who either think that a page like mine’s sole purpose is to either start “chatting”, to “sex chat” or to hook up one way or the other. Now whilst for some it may actually work, I have not met a single lady that’s into that or that any of these creepy messages work for.
What I’ve discovered even more surprising and in many instances; infuriating is that my type of content – these guys feel – give them the reason to talk like that. It appears that their ability to be grown-ass adults goes completely amiss once a woman posts pictures on social media of their naked skin or a glimpse of breasts/buttocks.
What I have realised is that because it’s only of late, that it has become more of a norm for people to venture into the adult side of things, that most of the “average” Joe Soap do not really know how to deal with it. Whether or not they should dirty talk, is that what people want? Or whether or not you compliment private areas on a body in public since this individual is clearly that comfortable with sharing it online.
Following my “What-the-DM” blogs, it is clear that some really don’t give a toss as in their opinion you are out there to show off sexually therefore you deserve to be spoken to in a certain way. It infuriates me so much as it seems that a lot of people need to be taught to work on their way of thinking. The age-old “if you dress that way, you can’t complain” still sticks in this type of peoples minds.
I often wonder if these guys would have the balls to say what they say to nudist/adult workers in person should they ever meet them? Or whether they’d be surprised that the purpose of some of these images is definitely not intending to receive disrespectful comments or messages. And why if you thought that the intention was for attention, would it be okay to use disgusting language?
So how would one expect to be spoken to should you post naked/adult content? Well, in short; the same way that a person who sits in church does. I have never asked or pointed out to people to focus on various parts of my body nor have I called those parts ugly words as one would do on the most famous adult websites. Therefore I expect you as the viewer to respect that at least. Though expectations always set one up for disappointment 😂
Many have told me before that because I have chosen this industry, I should not be so hurt nor surprised when men become uncontrollably horny and talk to me in that fashion. “After all, isn’t that what you want or what drives traffic to your OF site?” No, I do not want or need anyone to give me the dirty sexual energy of that of lust. Nor is my work of the nature where I want that type of audience. HOWEVER, even if that was my audience I would imagine that I would STILL want and deserve respect and be spoken to in a kind and respectful manner.
And in conclusion; most of these followers seem to want to “go for a coffee”. Out experience, most of the followers can’t even have a decent conversation on a social media site, can’t understand many of the topics that I study or talk about and have no idea how to do most things other than talk about “pussy”. I also doubt that they’d know what to do with someone like me. I am opinionated, I am feisty, and I know exactly what I deserve. Furthermore – would you be able to introduce someone like me to your parents or family? And know that all my naked photos are on the internet 😂😝
Last week I posted on Instagram that I came across another post on Facebook of a guy that moans and bitch about women who “allow their bits to hang out” whilst adding some motivational quote as a caption.
“So what” I say! So what that some women (or men) feel great/empowered/comfortable enough to do that. If you do not agree with it or do not enjoy seeing it; move on. Unfollow. Don’t look! Save yourself from this scary atrocity (insert gasping and screaming)
After posting this a young lady replied in my comment section that it is “not about the bits that’s hanging out, but more about self-respect. Your body is your temple”. Weeeeellllllllllllll that was me. Leaving it for a few minutes; as I wouldn’t want my emotions to get the better of me. This prompted me to remind myself not only of the ignorance and misinformed population/era/society we live in but also that many people choose to follow whatever they are told.
So my explanation to this have several points, and I guess together with sexual exploitation, abuse of any kind and human trafficking; this topic is something I am very very VERY passionate about.
For the mere ease of general day to day life, we as humans have not only grown accustomed to a “microwave society” (everything is done with ease in a limited amount of time); we have started replacing having to deal with “things” with technology, substances, alcohol or any type of escapism.
Never more evident than plonking kids in front of a telly in order for you to get on with things. Or thrusting a device into the children hands whilst out and about to ensure there are no tantrums, begging or moaning etc. We much rather go buy a packet sauce than making the sauce ourselves. We much rather enjoy getting high or do a few shots to have a great time than to have proper stimulating conversation or dance, party and pull an all nighter with the assistance of something.
My point is (there is one hahahaha); we would not think twice to use toxins that pollute our bodies, or use technology that takes our focus and growth away. It is so much more convenient to use foods that’s so incredibly processed or treated with chemicals. Never mind what these toxins are doing to your health. Never mind what that cigarette or alcohol is doing to your body or health!
So this “self-respect” thang
Self-respect starts with you looking after yourself. That you have enough self regard to do that. It means self-love. It means having faith in yourself. It means being proud of yourself. Being nude and happy in your skin surely then means having self respect? This brings me to the next point.
I mentioned to this young lass that I hope to inspire other women by doing what I do. And her retort was that she would not find it empowering. YES!! I agree, you do not have to find what I do motivating, inspirational or empowering. In fact; as the saying goes; Modesty empowers some and Nudity empowers others.
You do YOU Boo
HOWEVER; if at the age of 39 I have had the guts to start over. To change my body, to kick Lupus’ ass each day, to kick depression’s ass each day, to take up new hobbies and lifestyle changes. To change my profession and follow my dreams. To face heart break, grief, absolute devastation, trauma, abuse and still – STILL face the world. Still standing strong in what I believe in – in all my nudity and show that I am winning every single day; whilst being a mother helping one child through Uni and another through their goals to become an Olympic athlete – then YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!!! THAT is how I wish to empower and motivate people.
Don’t tell me people that are semi naked or naked on social media have no self respect. You have NO IDEA what is going on in their life. No idea, why they do what they do. If it bother’s you so much; scroll past or unfollow. Stop pissing on each others batteries. There is enough sunshine for everyone; you do not need to put people down to feel better about yourself.
LOVE AND KINDNESS ALWAYS
Quite often I am asked a variety of questions that eventually becomes mundane to answer. Psychologically almost every human LOVES two things: Hearing their name and talking about themselves. HOWEVER; when the same questions pop up day in day out for a couple of years, it can get a little long in the tooth to answer.
I love engaging with my followers and love answering (most) questions, so I almost feel that it’s pretty unfair of me to become this stultify. Hence writing an “updated version” of about me. Now you will notice I say “updated” and that would be in view of the fact that I have indeed written two other posts with said topic. Never the less, I feel that I should update you guys on the topic at least once a year as I am a very impulsive, spontaneous and passionate individual that love changes.
To keep it neat and tidy, and to mix things up a bit (in comparison to my last two blogs about this topic anyway), I’ll answer the questions in true questionnaire fashion.
- How tall are you? 1, 80m (6ft)
- How many tattoos do you have? So many!! I don’t actually count them)
- How long have you been modelling? About four years full time.
- What made you decide to pursue modelling? I used to do ramp modelling whilst a teen. When we migrated to South Africa after living in the UK for several years, a friend asked me to be their “test subject” for a lighting set-up. After which I was approached by a photographer that asked whether I’d shoot boudoir with him. I agreed and our work together was stunning. He asked me to consider working with him again. Some of our work involved more explicit content (nude) which I absolutely loved. I was surprised as to how comfortable I felt in front of the camera. I was beginning to receive many more requests to shoot and that was the birth of my nude modelling career. In the interim, I’ve worked for several art schools (live posing), art studios, artists, television and publications.
- How old are you? Just turned 40
- How do your family and friends feel about you being naked in front of millions? I have lost an entire group of “friends” that felt that a mum and wife should not do “this”. That it is “disrespectful”. The most painful process is learning that the people who you think are loyal to you, don’t have your back. The most liberating feeling is when you realise that they were not actually your “friend”. My family are my biggest fans. My children especially – as they have learnt to follow their dreams and passions. That every person’s BODY is a beautiful BODY, no matter the sex, size or race – and whether you are nude or covered. My friends are all supportive and all love what I do and what I stand for.
- How often do you work out? I am on a training programme which I stick to and work closely with my coach. I train every day, 6 days a week weight training and 6 days a week yoga. I also eat a balanced healthy meal plan that ensures that I achieve my optimal energy levels. My diet excludes red meat, potatoes, gluten pasta’s, dairy and sugar. I eat at least 6 times a day.
- What diet are you on? See above
- Are you single? I am married with 2 children – my husband and I are no longer together and we are essentially in a conscious uncoupling process. The only reason why I would divulge this private information is that I feel more people would benefit from learning about this topic/method. I am considering using this method to counsel in future.
- Are you sexual? YES! and the great news is… SO ARE YOU! We are all sexual creatures. We were created to procreate. Most of all; most people were lead to believe that sex is shameful and sin – that is not true.
- What do you do? I could be facetious about this and say lots of things! Currently, I’m writing my blog 😜 On a serious note; I consider myself a full-time model, Artist, Networker, Life Coach, Counselor and Business Owner. I’m studying psychology and working towards helping as many people heal from whatever they are facing, as possible.
- Are you a pornstar? Please finish reading this blog, then return to the blog where I explain the difference between nudity and pornography.
- Why don’t you respond? I respond as often as I am able to. Believe it or not; Instagram and Facebook are not all I do.
- Why do you not chat more? See point 8.
- What inspires you? Knowing that I can make a difference. I cannot save the world, however, I can leave a legacy by touching at least one person’s heart or soul.
- Why do you not show your nipples and vagina? Because dear fella; I will not only be removed from social media platforms, I have a business to run. You may find all my uncensored work on here. If you are only keen to see my vagina, or up my uterus – please feel free to type “vagina” (or relevant terms) into your search engine as I am sure you will find said options in all shapes and sizes.
I often feel that most people are quite surprised in learning that I am a little more intelligent than what they assume me to be (pun not intended). However, it never fails to surprise me how some people underestimate a woman that seems to be comfortable to be nude or semi-nude. That being said; I’m rather content with how little people know about me, as as much as I love creating nude imagery, I prefer for people to know as little as possible about me. Oh, the paradox!
Another topic that keeps rearing its head is that people ask advice. Relationship, career and personal life advice. I’ve always been called the “Agony Aunt” in my friend circles and never really minded. Perhaps why I’ve decided to take councilling more serious? So I’m toying with the idea of offering an “Agony Aunt service” 😂
Let me know what your thoughts are! And as always, thank you for following me, for reading my blog, for supporting me and most of all; for your kindness. For every dick pic (DP) I receive; I receive at least 80 kind DM’s. 1:80 is not a bad ratio at all ❤️